Healthy Mind Healthy Life Podcast: Healing in Sisterhood: Using Self-Advocacy & Nervous System Care to Defeat Burnout
In a world that demands too much and gives too little back, burnout has become a silent reality for countless high-performing women. This episode of Healthy Waves dives into the solution: radical self-advocacy, reclaiming identity, and finding healing in sisterhood.
Allison Pazuk (creator of the BONKERS framework) and Valerie Pedigo (founder of Renewed Spirit Adventures) join host Avik for a powerful conversation on how to stop the unraveling and step into being the CEO of your own wellness.
The Burnout Trap: Pushing Through at All Costs
Valerie Pedigo shared her experience as a high-achieving banker, realizing that high performance can be a mask for underlying burnout and disconnection from one's authentic purpose [03:25]. Her turning point came when she was literally unable to walk but still answered a phone call from work, highlighting the "I'll just push through" mindset that leads to physical and emotional collapse [06:03].
Allison Pazuk resonated with this experience, noting the same "pull up your big girl panties" mentality that led her to ignore decades of "nudges" until she was hit with the "sledgehammer" of a Stage III ovarian cancer diagnosis [08:45]. For both women, the crisis served as the permission to become nonconforming and break the rules of traditional living.
The Power of Sisterhood and Community
Valerie explained the science behind sisterhood and community, noting that isolation—often forced by societal expectations—is the enemy of healing [11:13]. When women share their stories, they soften their shoulders, regulate their breath, and gain an inherent strength, realizing they are not alone.
Allison initially found herself alone, even leaving cancer support communities because of a pervasive victim mentality [17:44]. She eventually found her needed community during a retreat where she found the courage to ask for help cutting her hair as she lost it to chemotherapy. The silent support, prayers, and presence of others demonstrated the profound, unspoken healing that happens in true connection [19:17].
Practical Tools for Nervous System Reset
Valerie stressed that the nervous system is the key to setting the baseline for all healing, as the brain cannot differentiate between a psychological threat (stress about a boss) and a physical one (a saber-tooth tiger) [22:11]. The constant state of fight-or-flight is what leads to burnout.
She offered a powerful, one-minute tool for instant reset:
The "I Am Held" Breath Cycle:
Place one hand on your heart and one on your belly.
Breathe in through your nose for a count of four, thinking "I AM."
Hold for a count of four.
Exhale slowly out through your mouth for a count of eight, thinking "HELD."
Do this three times to reset your nervous system and create space for aligned action [24:43].
Reclaiming Your Power: Self-Advocacy & Identity
Allison emphasized that the S for Self-Advocacy in her BONKERS framework is the non-negotiable thread. She became the CEO of her body, walking into appointments with questions and research to advocate for a path that included fasting and holistic therapies, even when doctors initially resisted [32:12].
Valerie added that identity reclamation is the "crux of everything." As women shed the layers of "gunk" (pain, shame, guilt), they begin to align with their authentic code. This will inevitably change external relationships and careers, as you have to say goodbye to things that no longer serve your soul's purpose [37:12].
